A Change Is Gonna Come
by MrsShepherd
Summary: My season four. Is it really over between Derek and Meredith? Will George change his mind and do his internship again? How's Cristina holding up?
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: So this is my new story 'A Change Is Gonna Come' and it's what I think the season four premiere should be like. Hopefully I'll have enough ideas to finish this story properly, but I still could use some help, so if you have any ideas, let me know. I hope you'll enjoy. **

"So you broke up with Derek?" Cristina asked after a long time of silence.

It had been a couple of hours since Burke had told Cristina that he didn't want to marry her anymore. He didn't like the reason that she was doing it; just to make him happy. And then he'd left. Cristina hadn't expected to find the apartment empty when she got there. She hadn't expected Burke to have packed his belongings and just leave. She wondered whether he'd come back.

"Yeah, I guess." Meredith mumbled. "I told you so."

"What? That if Burke and I couldn't do this, you and Derek couldn't do this either? Because, that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. Seriously!"

"Whatever, Cristina. It's over. So freakin' over."

Truth was; Meredith ended it mainly because Derek was always there for her. She had someone who wanted to communicate and be her knight in shining armour and that scared the hell out of her. But she was even more afraid of the fact that Derek could leave her again. He had done it before, so why not again. After all, he'd met a girl at Joe's. Everyone that was close – well relatively close – left her eventually. Her father left her when she was only five, because her mother cheated on him. Well, it was what her mother deserved, but Meredith suffered from it. She wasn't close to her mom, she worked a lot and the time she was at home, they pretty much always argued. Then her mom got Alzheimer's and died and she met her other family. She got pretty close to her stepmom, but she died as well. And her father blamed her and so he left her again. Her life pretty much sucked to her.

"Why don't you come with me on my honeymoon?" Cristina asked. "I guess we could use some time off."

"You planned a honeymoon?" Meredith asked quite surprised. "You even come to the hospital on your days off."

"I didn't have much of a choice, did I? With Momma arranging pretty much everything." Cristina answered. "I believe she planned a trip to the Bahamas. Our plane would leave in the morning."

"Well, I guess we could go. It's a good way to avoid everything and everyone. I'll go home and pack some of my stuff, okay?" Meredith proposed. "You'll be okay here?"

"Of course, I'm not a little child anymore. Besides, I'd rather not talk to Barbie and Evil Spawn right now."

"Okay. I'll be back in a bit." Meredith said as she grabbed her car keys and walked out of the apartment.

When Meredith arrived at her house, she pulled the car up the driveway and entered the house. She noticed not just Izzie and Alex in the kitchen; George and Callie were there too. They all looked like hell.

"Hey." Meredith greeted as she grabbed a chair and sat down next to Alex at the kitchen table.

"How's Cristina holding up?" Izzie asked.

"Like Cristina. Burke left, by the way." Meredith answered.

"What do you mean?" George asked.

"Well, like he grabbed his stuff and left the apartment empty."

"What? Is he coming back?" Callie was shocked.

"I don't think so." Meredith said. "Cristina and I are going to the Bahamas. Tomorrow morning."

"Bahamas?" Alex said. "But dude, what about work?"

"It'll only be for a couple of days. Kind of a waste to throw away the honeymoon tickets. I could really use some time away from this all. Away from Derek."

"What wrong with Derek? I thought you were couple of the year?" Alex joked.

"Yeah, sure. That's why I broke up with him." Meredith answered sarcastically. "Anyway, I'm going to go pack and then I'm heading back to Cristina's."

Meredith stood up and walked back to her room. She grabbed a suitcase from under the bed and opened her closet. It was also filled with some of Derek's belongings. After all, they slept here more often then at the trailer. Meredith grabbed one of Derek's sweaters and smelt him. She put it back quickly. She didn't want to regret her decision and start crying like a baby.

When she'd finally packed she heaved the trunk down the stairs. Izzie was waiting for her down the stairs. She looked serious.

"What about the Chief? Does he know?" Izzie asked.

"No. I'll call him later. If Derek asks where I am, you don't know. Okay?" Meredith ordered.

"Sure. Why did you break up with him anyway?"

"Later, Iz. I figure you have some things of your own to deal with, right?"

"I guess."

"See you in a couple of days, Iz." Meredith said as she left the house and drove back to Cristina's.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: So here's chapter 2 already. It's just that I've got a day off and I'm really bored, so I write. Don't get used to this regular updating. Because I really suck at that. Anyway, I hope I don't let you down with this chapter, even though I think there's something missing...**

"Cristina?" Meredith asked as she entered an empty apartment.

"I'm in the bedroom." A voice said.

Meredith dropped her luggage in a corner and went to the bedroom. Cristina was also busy packing. She'd already filled a suitcase and she was now busy packing the second one.

"How much clothes do you think you'll need, Cris? It's the Bahamas; I don't want to do much more than lying on a beach…" Meredith said.

"You don't want to find some other man candy?"

"Cristina!"

"I was only joking, Mer. I know you and McDreamy'll get back together as soon as we've arrived back at the hospital."

"I don't think so." Meredith muttered.

The next morning the two grabbed a cab to the airport and after about six hours they landed on the Bahamas. They grabbed a cab to the hotel.

"Wow, this is fancy!" Meredith said as they arrived at the hotel.

"What did you expect? Did you really expect me and Burke living in a hotel with cockroaches?"

"Well, you're bitter today. I don't know about you, but as soon as we've unpacked, I'm going to the beach."

"Sure."

They unpacked their suitcases and put some things in a small bag, so that they could take it to the beach. Then they put their bikinis on and went to look for an empty spot on the crowded beach, even though it was in the late afternoon.

A couple of hours later, they decided to go back to the hotel to grab something to eat.

"Cris, do you really think I've made a mistake?" Meredith suddenly asked.

"Yeah, I do." Cristina answered. "I really don't get you. When you're not together you're pining for him, and when you are together, you're looking for a way to get rid of him."

"Cristina…" Meredith started, but was interrupted by Cristina.

"No, Meredith. I wasn't ready yet. You don't have unlimited chances to have the things you want. You can't keep doing this, because one day, he won't want you back anymore, even though he loves you more than anyone in the whole wide world. And that day you'll come to me to whine about Derek. Do you really think I look forward to that? Seriously?"

"Cristina, everyone keeps leaving me." Meredith started to get emotional. "He'll do too, eventually."

"Meredith, that's bullshit, you know that."

"He's done it before, why wouldn't he do it again?"

"Well, unless he's got another secret adulterous wife that screwed another McSteamy somewhere, I'm sure he won't leave you. He's madly in love with you Meredith, don't you see? I saw him when you were experiencing your near-death experience Meredith, and really… it was so obvious. And you should've seen Addison. I guess for the very first time she realised that her marriage to Derek was nothing compared to what you were having with Derek."

"Really?"

"Really. But now you've broken up. How do you think you'll make it up this time? I don't think we'll be having a prom anytime soon."

"He wanted me to break up Cristina. If I thought there was no future for us."

"So? Just because Burke left me standing at the altar doesn't mean you can't be with Derek. I told you that before. You're not me and Derek's not Burke. You want my opinion?"

"Well, I guess you've made your point already. But I'm not sure Cris. It's hard. It's not just that I'm afraid he's going to leave me. He's also very suffocating. He's always there, even when I need time alone."

"And my guess is you haven't talked to him about this. You're starting to act weird because you're suffocating and Derek thinks you see no future for the two of you."

"I've been really stupid haven't I?"

"I'd say so, yes. But you're not the only one Mer. I've made some big mistakes too. Going out of my ways to make Burke happy. I can't believe that I really did that."

"We're just two surgeons with brains that have the size of a peanut. I can't believe we actually passed the intern exams."

"Yeah."


	3. Chapter 3

"What's wrong with you?" Cristina asked sleepily when Meredith stormed to the bathroom to throw up for the sixth time in an hour.

"Hangover." Meredith groaned.

"Normally you're able to hold back some more. We only had three shots."

"Well, then it's a jetlag." Meredith yelled from the bathroom.

"Or maybe you should do a pregnancy test." Cristina joked.

"I'm not pregnant!" Meredith yelled angrily.

"Care to put a bet on it? You're so emotional lately and now the vomiting. And I swear to God that you're breasts are bigger too. Or did you get a secret consult from McSteamy?"

"Cristina! It's not funny! But sure, I'm going to win anyway. Derek and I invented condoms."

"Exactly. That's why I'm going to win. Fifty bucks?"

"We're on." Meredith said as she got back from the bathroom and back in bed.

As the days went by, Cristina got more and more sure that she was going to win the bet. Every morning the same ritual started. Around five Meredith stormed off the bathroom for the first time and she repeated that every ten minutes, for at least 3 hours.

So, on the fifth day of the holiday Cristina secretly went to a drug store when Meredith was taking a nap. She bought a couple of pregnancy tests and some folic acid.

"Hey, sleepy head. Wake up. I have a surprise for you." Cristina teased as she got back from the drug store.

"You're mean." Meredith groaned, but got up anyway.

"I know." Cristina grinned and handed the bag over to Meredith.

Meredith opened the bag and immediately the look on her face changed.

"How many times do I have to tell you that I'm not pregnant?!" She asked, a bit irritated.

"Well, too many times. So I figured that you could prove it to me. You're not scared to loose the bet, are you?"

"Fine! I'll take these damn tests, but you're really not going to win!" Meredith yelled as she stood up and walked into the bathroom, closing the door behind her.

"Oh, and Meredith?" Cristina yelled to the closed bathroom. "You better not throw away the proof."

The bathroom door stayed closed longer than Cristina's expected. It had been almost twenty minutes since Meredith had locked herself up in there and still Cristina hadn't heard anything.

"Meredith, are you okay?" Cristina asked. Then she heard some sniffing. "Meredith, open the door."

It took a while, but then – finally – the door was being opened. Meredith stood there with red, bloodshot eyes.

"Positive?" Cristina tried to ask, hiding her little bit of joy. She'd just won fifty bucks. But she also knew that Meredith was far from ready for this.

Meredith nodded, handing Cristina the positive pregnancy tests.

"Now that bastard knocked me up! He really doesn't know how to give me some peace and quiet when I need it!"

Cristina then decided that she should show some supportive side of her, that she kept hidden most of the times. She sat down on the floor, next to Meredith and put her arm around Meredith's neck. Then Meredith put her head to rest on Cristina's shoulder, sobbing.

They sat there like that for hours - not moving, not talking – until Meredith had finally calmed down a bit.

"You're feeling better?" Cristina asked.

"No, but we can't keep sitting here all day, can we?" Meredith said as she stood up.

"Do we need to talk about this?"

"Not now, Cris. I'm going out for a walk okay. I just need to be alone for a while."

Cristina was flipping through some magazines when Meredith returned almost two hours later.

"Hey." Meredith said, as she closed the door.

"Hey." Cristina greeted back.

"I don't know what to do, Cristina. I've been thinking about this over and over again and I just can't decide."

"First of all, I think you should tell Derek when we get back."

"Cristina."

"You asked. Second… I think you should take the folic acid, just in case you do decide to keep it. Which I don't recommend. You're a resident, residents don't get babies. Attendings do."

"What about Bailey?"

"Screw Bailey."

"And Callie and George?"

"That's different, last time I checked Callie wasn't pregnant yet."

"If I can work things out with Derek and he's okay with it, I might consider keeping it."

"Seriously, Meredith!"

"A couple of days ago you said I wasn't you, and well, this proves it right. I know you would've gotten an abortion right away."

**Author's Note: I know it's not the best way to end a chapter, but I really didn't know what to add to this. I think all's said and done here on holiday's. I hope you liked it anyway. They'll be back in Seattle next chapter.**


End file.
